Random Acts of "Kindness"

Posts tagged ‘Angels’

JOB

I am EXTREMELY LUCKY. I am retired, live in my own house and thankfully have enough money to pay our bills. My health is reasonably good. Thankfully my children are also doing well. We have food to eat. We have a roof over our heads. In this time of a raging pandemic, as long as we are careful, stay home, wear masks and gloves when going out and wash hands and surfaces — with God’s help — we will be all right.

Sadly the places I like to wander to are closed. Both zoos in our city, the museums and the Botanic Garden are not open to visitors. Many of the stores are not open either. The sheriff in the county our campground is located in prefers we stay home. I attend Mass on television.

If our state opened up today I don’t know how ready I would be to wander. This disease is running rampant. The county our campground is located in — had NO DISEASE until last week. Then 7 cases arose from a meat packing plant. This disease is claiming the lives of many people. At first, they announced that the elderly were most at risk but it seems as time is going on that all ages are fair game.

My husband was 80 years young when he passed. He had emphysema and diabetes. He WOULD NOT have handled this virus well. Although I wasn’t at the hospital when he passed, my children where. Many people are passing from this virus without their loved ones being at their side.

And I guess that is the reason that I’m supposed to continue writing these thought rambles. I AM EXTREMELY LUCKY THAT FIRST, I KNOW THERE IS LIFE ON THE OTHER SIDE AND SECOND, THAT THEY ARE WELL. I don’t have any idea of what they do or what they look like but I know that I often receive “help” when I need it.

I self-published JOURNEY WITH ME in 2007. The date is printed in the book. I don’t know if it is still available on line. TO PAP, WITH LOVE IS. I had a reason to look recently.

I don’t know when I first started writing these thought rambles and published on Word Press. I think it is more than eight years ago. This month is my anniversary and evidently I’m supposed to continue.

EVERYONE NEEDS A JOB — EVIDENTLY THIS IS MINE.

INDIA

When my father passed over, he had not learned how to use a computer. But he was very comfortable with a typewriter. It did not take him long to learn how to mess with my writing. My father was a very intelligent man. He was an inventor and a printer. It did not take him long to STOP computers from working or to stop the printer from printing. It did not take him long to figure out how to erase some of the words that I was writing. Soon after my father passed, I began a new learning. Some things I understood quickly, others took a MUCH LONGER TIME.

When my husband passed, he had the advantage of knowing how computers worked. Also cell phones. He has made his presence known in a way that is uniquely his. He stops the TV from working. He prevents my changing the channels. He is having a GRAND TIME MESSING with my text messages on the cell phone. Since my father did not include those things in his “help” I’m reasonably certain that it is my husband.

Then India started appearing on my cell phone when I was checking the weather. I was CONFUSED. It took a bit of time before I figured out where the 102 temperature was coming from. I knew it wasn’t in my back yard. Finally I learned it was in Rajasthan, India. Exactly where that city is India I have no idea. Why is it important? Another good question. The first time it occurred I thought since I was going shopping, it might be a message to wear a mask. I DID.

The temperature has popped up a few more times. I wasn’t planning on going out. I wasn’t planning on going shopping. After a few days, and help from the news paper, I realized that Ramadan was beginning. That is a month long religious celebration in which the people fast from sunrise to sundown. They don’t even drink water or smoke. They will have a harder time during this pandemic. Since I realized that — India only pops up when I’m going shopping.

As I was writing this thought ramble, the thought popped up that it might be interesting to see if there is really a message on the cell phone. It will be interesting to test out the theory.

CELEBRATING ANOTHER YEAR

I wish I remembered the year I started writing these thought rambles. I think it was in May that I was enticed to write. My youngest daughter told me about Word Press and that it was free. The name I picked for the blog was open. The name was accepted and ready or not I began. Now if you have read many of my thought rambles, you can understand that I really don’t think it was my decision. I was led to share the happenings of my life with others. My life becomes more interesting than I want it to when I haven’t written.

I realize that I’m extremely fortunate to have “help” from the other side. We all have a purpose in our life and evidently mine is to share that there is existence after death. I can’t comment on it further because I have no personal knowledge of the other side. I’m very happy to know of its existence and have the “help” of my team.

I don’t know the makeup of my team. Just guessing I would say that it is made up of my mother and brother who have probably been involved in my life since their passing. Joined 25 years ago by my father and recently by my husband. My mother and brother kept their involvement quiet. I didn’t really know that I was receiving “help” from the other side until my father got Alzheimer’s disease. Looking back at that time I was able to detect “help.” Thankfully my father let me know when he passed that he was fine. My father has helped me with many aspects of my life including writing. My husband has improved on this. He “helps” me with my phone and the television. Since my father didn’t mess with those things I know when my husband is around. And I am EXTREMEMLY happy with his involvement EXCEPT when I’m prevented from doing something I want to do.

I was also given the gift of seeing a deceased dog run through our house the night she was put down. I don’t know if she is on my team but I know that there are a few paws that are. After one of our dogs passed, many dogs that I didn’t know that I was their best friend. I have to credit Cuyler for that.

I’m also sure that friends and relatives of mine “help” out from time to time. I might actually be asking for their “help” when I have a project that isn’t going well.

My sharing my experiences before was possibly helpful. I’m hoping that because of the deaths caused by Covid 19, my thought rambles might help more who were unable to be by their loved ones side when they passed.

CORONA 19 BREAK

Our daughter had reservations to go to Mexico for Spring Break. The big question: Should they Go? They decided that the area where they were going was free from the virus. They had their plane reservations. I understood their concern, their questions. I do what I always do — I bombarded heaven with prayers for a safe trip and return.

I was extremely happy that I had stocked up on fresh food when I went to the store last week. I’m no longer young — I’m at an age when the virus is more dangerous. When I replaced my driver’s license, I stopped at the Senior Center to tell them I would be skipping art for the next two weeks because of the dogs. While I was there, I learned that the Center would be closed because of the virus. That night a friend phoned to tell me their assisted living dwelling was on lock down.

Crowds gathered to celebrate St. Patrick’s day at the bars. Our mayor announced all bars and restaurants would be closed. Food could be order for take out and delivered. Both zoos in our area closed. Our state held its primary election on Tuesday but thankfully I voted early. The Botanic Garden announced they would be closed until April 30. Woodhaven was open — but there was no way I was going out with three dogs and an open yard. Department stores were the next to announce closing. I listened to the news — concerned that my family would be able to leave Mexico and return home.

Wednesday I phoned to see if our neighborhood Chinese restaurant was open. I was VERY HAPPY to learn I could place an order. Since we live close by, my son went to pick it up.

Woodhaven announced that it was closing all comfort stations. Gas could be pumped using a credit card for payment. Access to the store was restricted. Main gate was open and security would continue to patrol the grounds.

The best thing that happened that week was the birth of my great grand son on Friday. The second best thing was I learned that my daughter’s family was in LA. They would be flying home on Saturday. They planned to stay overnight to celebrate my grandson’s birthday. They didn’t know that they would be sequestered in their rooms.

All churches are closed. Our Cardinal celebrated mass at the cathedral. “We are like the blind man. Can’t see what is coming. Have to trust in God.”

Luna and Tessa were MISSED. My daughter planned to drive to Chicago with her kids to get them. She didn’t want me to take a chance on the drive. They stayed by the garage and I stayed on the porch. Their dogs had been enjoying our bed. I didn’t have the heart to make them get off. As a parting gift, on Monday, I WOKE to be pinned by a black Lab washing my face. Laying straddled over my body.

BREAD CRUMBS

I don’t know if my life would be easier if I received messages from “my team” in written word or in voice. Since neither occurs in my life I felt like Hanzel and Grettle — searching for directions and reflecting back, look for the meaning.

Confused? Let me explain. When I went to replace my driver’s license on Tuesday, I decided to get gas in my car so I’d be ready to meet our daughter, pick up her dogs, so their family could go on Spring Break. I decided to go to the Costco up North. The lines for gas were shorter. While I was there, I stopped in the neighboring Aldis and picked up potatoes, onions, milk and some fresh vegetables. I noticed that they had a cane on special and a cart that was able to climb stairs. I looked at both items but left them on the shelf. Since we would have extra dogs in the house, I wanted to make sure our pantry was well stocked.

Leaving Aldis I decided to stop in Costco. I didn’t have trunk space for water but I decided to get a 5 LB bag of small potatoes. We discovered that they worked nicely for breakfast hash in the morning.

Arriving home I mentioned the cane and the cart to my son. He thought both would be a good purchase. The cart would be useable when I was in the country, I would have help getting the purchases from car into camper.

Wednesday — I remembered that I needed to get an emission test for the Escape and renew the license. There was a facility near Wal-Mart so I took advantage of a dry day — got the test for the car and license, picked up more supplies at Wal-Mart and returned to Aldis to get the cane, cart AND a deck bird feeder.
I decided to get a feeder for the deck rather than a stand alone because I thought it would be easier to fill.

Thursday — I met our daughter to pick up her dogs along with their dog food and leashes. Our yard is fenced in — I DID NOT PLAN to take them for a walk. Luna is a black Lab — young, full of energy, full of love. Her favorite toy is a ball which she has to take to bed with her. She is most insistent that you play with the ball with her — OVER AND OVER –ALL DAY. Tessa is a small King Charles spaniel. They are bred to be lap warmers and she takes her job very seriously.

Friday — Chicago’s mayor announced schools would be closed starting Tuesday because of the virus until April 7. Illinois Governor issued a message that people should stay in their homes. I went to Costco to pick up a couple of items that were on sale. The parking lot was impossible — too many cars. I waited and got a parking place. Costco was overrun with people. More than 50 people were in one lane waiting to check out. I decided I didn’t need anything that bad. I stopped in Trader Joe’s. Once again the parking lot was full but I waited and got a space. I HAVE NEVER SEEN THE SHELVES SO EMPTY — no milk, eggs, bread, crackers. Some fresh vegetables but not a lot. Most of the meat was gone.

I was VERY THANKFUL I HAD PICKED UP SUPPLIES ON TUESDAY AND WEDNESDAY.

REBELLING AGAIN

REBELLING AGAIN

I don’t like not being able to go shopping. I DON’T like not being able to drive the car. I DON’T LIKE not being able to go outside. The first two months of this year has restricted my freedom. We have had snow storms that weren’t bad. BUT the snow melted, iced formed. I have had to stay in the house, the stairs were too slippery to go off the porch. I have been unable to drive — the alley was too icy to take the car out of the garage.

I look forward every year to the MIND, BODY, SPIRIT EXPO. I received the information announcing the March Expo. I found a couple of workshops I wanted to attend. Dressed, I assembled the stuff I wanted to take with me. I prepared to transfer my driver’s license into the wallet I was going to take. I COULDN’T FIND IT. I looked everywhere — every purse I might have used, every coat I might have warn. I looked in my car in case it fell out when I was taking out a credit card. My son helped me look with no success. I finally decided NOT to go to the Expo. I don’t know how I lost my drivers license. I don’t know how long I had driven without one. I just decided I wasn’t going to take a chance. My son offered to drive me but I knew he wouldn’t want to stay and turned down his offer.

Normally I return to the Expo for the second day on Sunday. I made an executive decision to stay home. I’m sure I would have found a few talks that would have interested me. Sunday was a bright, WARM, sunny day. I decided to spend time outside instead.

A friend told me it was easy to get a new license BUT NOT TO GO ON A MONDAY. She suggested that I take the documentation needed to get an ID. I had an official copy of my birth certificate. I had proof of my address. I needed proof of my social security card. I took a copy of the form I received for income tax from my husband’s company. It was a good thing I did. I NEEDED A SECOND PROOF OF ADDRESS. I also needed something with my signature on it.

I left home early in the morning on a Tuesday. I entered a door that I thought would lead me to the drivers area. I was wrong. I needed to exit and walk down a distance and climb more stairs. STAIRS ARE NOT MY FRIENDS. I asked if I could wander down the area and get were I needed to go. I had been in the building many times over the years. Maybe it was my age but I was told to go ahead. As I made my way to the driver’s license room a guide appeared to help me. When I told her the purpose of my errand she escorted me to the proper place. I DID NOT NEED TO WAIT IN LINE. The process was quick. I was out of the building before an hour had passed. I have a much better picture on this license than my last one. YEAH!

LIMBO

I have to admit that I KNOW that I am extremely BLESSED. I was reminded of that fact last weekend when the wife of a brother-in-law posted a note on Face Book on the anniversary of his passing. Since he passed on Leap Year, this was the first anniversary. Not only did she still miss him, but she wished he would stop by to say “hi.”

Thankfully since my father’s passing twenty five years ago, I’m aware of the “help” I receive from the other side on a regular basis. Since he hadn’t remembered me before he passed, he quickly sent me a sign that he was fine. I don’t access Face Book regularly. I have to admit that I haven’t been on Twitter or any of the others to date. Of course every day is a new day and who knows what tomorrow will bring.

This morning Face Book had a note on Alzheimer’s. I was reminded of my father’s journey and very grateful that in his slipping away he didn’t get stuck in the time of the fire. Thinking of him this morning and the sadness and loss he must have felt at the death of his wife and son, I’m so glad that he didn’t revisit those years. I’ve written about our journey in TO PAP, WITH LOVE. I’m SO GLAD that my husband was able to let me know that he was fine and continues to “help” me.

I have to admit that I’m having a hard time adjusting to my new life as a widow. I seem to have lost my purpose. Since I don’t give in easily I’m trying. Reality is that I can sit and watch the world go by and not feel bad about it. I NEVER spent much time during the day watching television. I can’t say the same now. I know that I have many things that I SHOULD DO — I just can’t motivate myself to do them.

I realized that the problems my body parts are giving me might be the cause of my lack of purpose. Because of our weather, my knees have become more of a problem as well as my right ankle. Dealing with the pain wears me out. It is easier to sit and not move.

I know that I need to lose weight, I just can’t inspire myself to do it. In my defense, I have committed to morning and evening exercise. Both are easy and don’t take long but I do them daily. I have committed to walking more than 3,000 steps a day. Most days I reach that number. Sometimes it is easy. I have committed to eating raw turmeric. It has been two weeks and I’m not sure if I notice a difference. I have committed to using Collagen daily. It has been a week and I’m not noticing an improvement but I’m not giving up yet.

Spring is coming. Maybe my energy will return.

INTERVENTION

February is a hard month for me. First — it is colder and cloudy. The excitement of the holidays is over. Usually the decorations for the season have been put away. This year is an exception for me. It still is extremely cloudy — the sun has taken a sabbatical. Our memory Christmas tree changed into an Angel–Valentine tree. It might morph into a Mardi Gras — Easter tree but I doubt it.

Add to that the sadness of my husbands passing. I spoke to a woman who has been a widow for 6 years. She shared that it still isn’t easier. On top of that it was my husbands 81’st birthday. Followed by the anniversary of my father’s passing and soon my father’s birthday. That explains why the Angel tree is still sharing its light in a darker room. I did Tai Chi next to it this morning.

I have noticed more presence or “help” from “my team” on holidays, anniversaries and birthdays. This week has been no exception. My note from my husband’s birthday said I had a contrary phone. My sharing of his photo was blocked. On the anniversary of my father’s passing I stopped at the grocery store for a needed item. A woman noticed my problems walking and told me she used to have the same problem. She has been taking raw turmeric twice a day, ground in her food processor and her knee problems have ended. The product was usually available at the store. On order, it was coming in the next day. Looking for something for lunch I also found lamb chops and petite steak at half price.

Our youngest daughter told me that a friend of hers was taking turmeric liquid twice a day available at Costco. Stopping at the store I found it on sale and put a box in my cart. One of the sample ladies I talk to on a regular basis mentioned that she tried the liquid turmeric but it gave her diarrhea. She also had experienced the same problems that I was having. She switched to a product designed to increase her collagen. She also is no longer having the knee problems. I put the liquid turmeric back and found the collagen powder.

I planned to go to the grocery store and buy fresh turmeric. When I arrived, the product had not come in. A woman heard me asking for it and told me of a store that carried it. It is now in my possession but I haven’t been taking it long enough to notice a difference. I’m going to give the turmeric a week or more to see if it helps before trying the collagen.

Today we have sunshine. The vitamin D pill that I normally take rolled off the floor and is lost somewhere. I guess I’ll have to go outside to get some fresh Vitamin D. I was interested in a cookbook that was advertised on the computer. Suddenly it was blocked, covered up by more advertisements and disappeared when I tried to get it back.

ENOUGH. My children say I need to walk more — I’m going outside to get some sunshine.

MISTY EYES

I don’t cry easily. I wish I was able too. I would have LOVED to dissolve in tears when my husband passed. I’m sure there have been other times in my life when I had the same desire. Probably with the same results. I know people that cry at the sadness of a good book or a movie. Some cry for happiness — at a wedding. My eyes tear up, become a bit moist, might even relinquish a tear, but not a deluge or even a sprinkle.

So why the title of this thought ramble? We have just celebrated my husband’s 81st birthday without his physical presence. Facebook gave me a picture from 2017 in which we celebrated his birthday with our grandchildren in “horse country.” I recognized the photo right away. I have part of the image on my laptop. Both of the kids are there with their ice cream. The only thing I can see of my husband is his arm. I didn’t remember when the photo was taken, or what he was doing. The photo showed me we were celebrating his birthday, and included his humor — he was saluting the camera. I think he was the one to post the photo on my laptop, which why his body and face were not included.

I shared the photo with my family and friends. My middle daughter had an image of wings. My grand daughter was flying back to Florida. She posted an image from the plane in flight, mentioning this was the closest she could get to him right now. Our youngest picture posted a lovely picture of herself getting a hug from her father. MY EYES MISTED, to be honest — they are misting as I write this.

I’ve acknowledged that I am EXTREMELY LUCKY. Not only to have had him for a husband but to have our four children and grandchildren that I am proud of, who also miss him very much — who feel free to share their feelings. Since my father passed 25 years ago and confirmed that there is life after death, I know my husband is free from pain and able to enjoy being of “help” to me and others.

STILL LEARNING

I’m sure that I have mentioned that my father passed over to the other side 25 years ago. Because he had Alzheimer’s disease when he passed, he wanted me to know that he was okay and sent me a sign. He has been very active in my life since then. He also let another cat out of the bag. My mother passed when I was four. I’m sure she has been active in my life for many years but I was unaware. Looking back at some of the things that occurred when my father’s health declined, I can see the “help” of others. Some of that help was included in TO PAP WITH LOVE. I wrote about some of my early learning in JOURNEY WITH ME.

I need admit that I am STILL LEARNING. There is a new angel on the other side. He has learned from his elders and brought new knowledge to the adventure. It is only because I have spent so many years learning that I was receiving “help” that I’m aware of his actions. I recognizer “help” I when I’m shopping — I find something that is needed for a gift or a bargain — or something special on sale. I find someone tall to help me reach something or someone strong to move something into my car. People appear asking if they can help. I’m extremely grateful for all of the above. Sometimes I have a feeling who I can credit, sometimes it is a mystery.

Just being honest, I MISS MY HUSBAND. He was part of my life for more than 55 years. If I’m honest — I’m grateful he is on the other side because he was full of life, often up to no good. His last two months of inactivity was extremely hard for all of us. Continuing on in that state would have been extremely difficult for all of us.

And he is still in character — up to no good on the other side. For which I’m GRATEFUL EXCEPT when he puts blocks up on what I’m trying to do. You CAN NOT ARGUE WITH THEM, THEY WIN! The first time I was aware of his interaction, he blocked the TV from changing channels to the program I wanted to watch. When I finally gave in, went to accomplish a task that was on my to do list, when I returned home, the TV worked like it was supposed to. “My friends in high places” HAD NOT done this to me before. I knew it was him.

Today I was trying to share a photo of him riding a bike with our dog attached to the lead as they were going down the road. NOPE! NOT HAPPENING. Instead — my camera locked on a photo of my husband with Robin on his lap that floated down from somewhere to land on my purse. I COULD NOT get my camera to work like it was supposed to. Our oldest daughter suggested that it was Dad showing a new comer some of the “tricks of the trade.” Watch out world!

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