I remember when I had energy. I remember when I was able to sleep the whole night. I remember when I actually planned the things I wanted to do, or the stuff I needed to buy from the store. Sadly, my energy is hiding. Sadly although I get some rest, I still feel tired — my sleep is too broken. Sadly although I still make lists of what I need from the store, the list is often still sitting on the table when I leave the house, or it is missing some important items.
I’m hoping that this is only a temporary condition. I’m hoping that as we spend more time at home, I will be less fractured. I’m hoping that I will regain an interest in some of the activities I enjoy. Looking at our calendar, Thanksgiving is coming soon, and following after is Christmas. Today I have no interest in Christmas shopping and of course, no time to make presents. To complicate matters, many health appointments are now filling up our schedule. At least we had planned to stay in town.
I had considered checking out some activities at a near by senior center. I don’t know if I will have the time to participate. What I have learned as I try to surface from this fog is that if I ask a question, I’m often given an answer. The question seems to be jogging my memory or my “friends” are helping.
Just a couple of examples — standing in the pantry, I had come in with a purpose and the purpose had vanished. “Why am I here?” That question often provokes an answer. Recently while shopping, I knew that I had planned to go to a store to buy something. It wasn’t a store I normally went to, and I didn’t remember what I had planned to buy but I knew I thought it was important. It was on my mental list a few days ago, but I hadn’t had the time to purchase. Stopped at a traffic light, I threw questions out into the air. “Where do I need to go? What do I need to buy? Etc.” Thankfully I received an answer. I had wanted to buy a new calendar for next year. The one I’ve enjoyed this year is meant more for business people who have to keep track of their appointments. I’ve used it to track my food and other things. At the beginning of the month, it has a page for the whole month where I schedule appointments. As time gets closer to the new year, it becomes harder to buy specific calendars. Having a calendar for 2016 has already come in HANDY!